Why can’t the skinny girls be nice?
I went to a party this weekend with some casual acquaintances I have made on the local salsa circuit. This morning, I realized that not one of the women made me feel welcome at the party except for the one who invited me and the one who owned the condo. I mostly hung out with the guys, and that, believe me was no hardship, but come on! These women are many different ages and it was like being back in high school again. You know those teen movies where the new girl goes to the party and all the popular girls look at her like “What is She doing here?” Now, I am not saying they all looked at me like that, but no one really spoke to me, until later on, after copious amounts of alcohol had been consumed. One woman and I had a conversation, but we had never met before. At the party I was having a lot of fun dancing and talking with the guys, and I did purposely put myself to the task of being more outgoing and not pulling my usual wallflower, “I’m so sorry I’m so fat” schtick and hanging by myself pretending to have a good time. Maybe I only was outgoing with the men? Maybe they all want boyfriends and think I am adding myself to the hunt. Maybe they think fat girls shouldn’t salsa. I don’t know and I wish I didn’t care, but I am one of those people that wants everyone to like me, even though I don’t like everyone. =+)
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Tink, so sorry they were not nice (at the very least). They don’t know what they are missing by not getting to know you.
Be proud that you went and had a reasonably good time and were not being the wallflower.
Maybe the were jealous because you were talking to the men and that is where they wanted to be.
Chin up girl, you are beautiful and you are working on yourself, you will get ther one day.
Ah girl, get out there and be yo funny friendly self… make ‘em wanna hang out with you. You know big girls got more to give! You are perfect already woman. Those girls got their own issues and quirks and funny stuff… I know that ’cause we all do! Just do your thing girl! You beautiful and you know it! MUCH sisterly LOVE!
Tink, that sucks!! But I see where you are coming from. Unlike my online self, I’m very quiet until I feel comfortable in my surrounding. Heck, I wouldn’t talk to anyone out of fear.
Maybe Sheryl is right, maybe they are jealous. ?
((((TINK)))))
I’ve always gotten along better with men. Women usually think I’m a snob, until they take the time to know me. Then some of them still do. I’m shy, but not stupid. I don’t care anymore cause I’m older. and cause I like men better anyway - in those situations. Men are always nice…women need to work at it a little more. But they will come around - just keep going back. It’s a chore to put yourself out there when nobody seems to care. Good friends are hard to make, but worth it. And you are worth it.
((((((((Tink)))))))))
Hey Tink! I’m a lot like you: usually VERY shy at parties, and thinking that the people who didn’t talk to me must not have liked me or weren’t very nice.
BUT I’m going to play devil’s advocate here, and say that maybe they just didn’t want to leave their individual comfort zones to get to know the new girl. That happens a lot of times, and doesn’t necessarily make anyone a bad person in and of itself. Some of them might be shy too, and seem fine talking with their friends but really aren’t sure what to say to a new person. I’m like that sometimes too, and I’ve been told it makes me look snobby… in reality, I’m just always afraid the other person won’t like ME or that I’ll say something stupid because I don’t know you. (As in, foot in mouth syndrome, which I think is one of the most embarrassing things on the planet and avoid at all costs… even at the cost of appearing snobby. LOL)
So, I say, before writing them off, if you enjoyed yourself for the most part at the party, go again. Maybe next time, you’ll find that the more they see you, the less stand-offish they seem to be. I’m not saying it’s your job to make all the effort, but at the same time you probably don’t want to write off a group of people who could potentially be really fun to hang out with.
By the way, AMAZING job stepping out of your comfort zone of “wall flower”. That’s not an easy thing to do!
Meh, ignore them!
They’re not worth your frustrations.
Really.